- the root of all evil in relationships is the lie that I can control other people. That leaves the other person scrambling to get free from you controlling them
- the most important thing you have in any relationship is your heart to heart connection to them. So if dragging them to church is damaging that then I let go of that and hold on to them. But I communicate what’s important to me and how it makes me feel in an honest way. Be such a supporter of them thatthey feel like a fool to ever endanger that. Somebody values your heart so much that they’ll change their options and freedom to keep from hurting you.
- Usually people who are emotionally distant and shut down are highlysensitive to manipulation.
- What you believe to be true is absolutely true to you. When you don’t like someone it’s often because they bring something into your life that you can’t control and it’s either hurtful or threatening to you.
- Relationships perish for lack of knowledge. When I have no idea how I’m affecting you I’ll never change it. I’ll never change what’s bothering you if I don’t know. The courage to be open and honest without being mean. You’re scared and just wanted space but didn’t want to tell them about you you just wanted them to back up. It’s so easy to tell other people about them when you feel scared or hurt instead of about you. “it scares me when . .
- If the threat of punishment is what we use to keep people from sin then we teach people that sin results in punishment
- Teach your children to control themselves. Do you want to control you or do you need my help?
- “you must be punished for sin” isn’t true.
- What are you going to do about the mess you just made with so and so?
- Mentality we’ve been taught is like a dog coming in the house and pooping on the carpet. We hit the dog and put it outside but leave the poopthere. The dog outside isn’t the goal but not having poop on the carpet. The goal is to reconcile the relationship through our mistakes. Leads to where we don’t know how to clean up our messes but only to harden our hearts so we aren’t hurt further.
- As long as I pretend like you’re powerless, you believe that and I believe that then it’s true and we build a relationship to keep it true.
- When dealing with someone that doesn’t realize they have a problem then hold up a mirror and ask “is this what you’re feeling”. Just ask questions and listen. Just ask “what are you going to do? How is that working out for you?” as long as they think somebody else has their problem then somebody else has their power. When I blame you for my life and circumstances I’ve given my power to you and I can’t change until you change and you control my life. When they say “I don’t know what I’m going to do” I’m going to ask “then what’s the problem?” and keep asking until we get to the problem.
- If you don’t learn how to manage your freedom your freedom will turn into a bondage. Whatever offers your freedom and victory you’ll have to learn how to manage and steward. When you attach shame or punishment to something you have empowered the devil in a situation. God is intent on giving you so much freedom that every bit of you destined to be glories, happens. People around you who are afraid of sin willtake away your freedoms. All things are permissible but not all things are profitable. You can do whatever you want but just a whole bunch of it is stupid.
- What are we gunna do if we get to heaven and everyone is naked?
- Perverted freedom causes destruction in your life
- How will you manage yourself to protect your love and your relationships?
